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What Xie's Up To

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What Xie's Up To

Exploring the tapestry of life one post at a time

Five Years Apart

Posted on June 15, 2025November 3, 2025 By xosolis

Five years ago, I had no savings and could barely afford anything for myself or my family. I didn’t look well, and my mental health was far from okay. I struggled to hold a job, found it hard to make new friends, and my mindset wasn’t in a good place. I remember crying almost every night while I was unemployed. During that time, I had so little money that I survived on Spanish bread for a month.

When I finally did get a job, I still found myself crying almost every week—this time because I didn’t want to go to work. I was overwhelmed, unhappy, and unsure of where my life was headed. Everything felt messy. I had no real sense of direction.

Now, five years later, I’m so grateful for how different things are. My life still isn’t exactly where I want it to be, but I also recognise just how far I’ve come. I left a toxic relationship. My mindset has completely shifted. My mental health is more manageable and much healthier. I don’t struggle with making friends at work anymore, and I no longer dread going in or worry about keeping my job. In fact, I’ll be celebrating my 5th work anniversary later this year.

I’m thankful every day for the stability my job provides—it’s helped me save for the future, support myself, and cover my needs comfortably. I feel healthier, I look better, and I’m in a much more positive place, both personally and in my relationship. I can afford to take holidays, buy things I never could before, and even rescued two cats.

Life feels lighter. It’s better. And I’m truly grateful that our honest, hard work has brought us here. We’ve been through so much, and it’s humbling to reflect on that journey.

I know the path ahead will still require effort, but I believe in it—and in myself. I can already imagine my future self, five years from now, looking back and being proud. Proud that whatever I achieve, I did so with honesty, intention, humility, discipline, and integrity.

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